janersm: (anna paquin: golden globes)
posted by [personal profile] janersm at 09:33pm on 08/09/2012 under , , ,

Dear Suncoast Basset Rescue,

I’m one of Willow’s former owners. She wasn’t crated the majority of her life. In fact, she was rarely put in her kennel. (The only times we really put her in there was when my mom, dad, and I would have to go somewhere together for a few hours or when paramedics would have to come to take my mom to the hospital—mom is very ill with kidney failure, diabetes, and high blood pressure.) She would protest going into the kennel and would run around the house trying to keep from going in one. She actually spent most of her days in a chair next to my mother’s couch. I’ve attached a picture of her in her chair, cuddled with one of her toys. She’s a very sweet girl and was actually housebroken when we got her. When my family’s health deteriorated dramatically in short time period, we were no longer able to take the dogs out enough to keep them housebroken. Willow has a few health problems, which you may or may not know about. (I hope that the shelter she came from told you about them.) She was diagnosed with an enlarged heart a few months after we first adopted her. She had to take Enalapril for that all year, and sometimes had to take theophylline to clear fluid out of her lungs. She was also diagnosed with an underactive thyroid, which caused her to lose hair in many spots. She was on a thyroid pill twice a day for that. And she had to have regular blood work done to make sure that her levels were maintained.

We also were the family of Molly, who is on your website at number 829. Molly was adopted in late 2003 or early 2004. She was born October 27, 2002 and her birth certificate is somewhere in our house, so she is quickly approaching her 10th birthday. Molly has cowered since we first got her. As one of our vets told us and as you noticed, she was abused. She was purchased from a breeder, left outside, given to someone else, and then she got pregnant. When that happened, her then owner took her to a shelter in Selma. She had her puppies, but the shelter there wasn’t feeding her enough to keep her at a healthy weight. When we adopted her, she was severely underweight. We had to feed her puppy chow to boost her weight, but she was always on the low end of normal. Before her second birthday, we found out that Molly had arthritis, which acts up when she is cold or when the weather is bad. Sometimes she gets angsty when that happens, but we would just rub her ears and try to keep her comfortable when that happened. Molly had breast tumors removed early on, and they were not cancerous. Earlier this year, though, she had a tumor removed from her left hip. She had some abscesses from the non-cancerous tumors. We kept them cleaned, which she didn’t usually mind, and had her checked by the doctor, which she didn’t like. (She has to be muzzled at the vet because she has a major fear of vets. She would growl anytime she would see or hear a vet or vet tech.) She loves to cuddle and she would lay in my lap whenever I would read. We joked that she read the entire Harry Potter series with me. She lost weight while she was in the shelter this year after she got sick and was depressed.

My parents and I didn’t want to give her or Willow or our other 2 dogs up, but we were extremely sick, our house was a mess and condemned to boot, and we had no other choice. We miss them and love them everyday, but we know that they are probably doing better in other environments. We were very happy to see that they made it to a basset rescue because we had hoped that if we couldn’t get them back that they would go to a basset rescue.

I wanted to send this to make sure that they’re taken care of and that your agency has a better understanding of these two girls.

Mirrored from fuzzypinkslippers.com.

janersm: (anna paquin: golden globes)

Mom just got a call from her mom. Apparently, I’ve been up to no good again and saying “bad things” about certain people. I thought this was weird because I haven’t been saying anything recently about certain people. The last thing that I could find that is public is something from September. It was a rant about my mom taking me for granted while glorifying a particular family member, who I was (and still am) annoyed with over the lack of participation in my mom’s recovery process. I still feel my rant is justified. Of course, I still feel my rant from January is justified and I feel the rant I made in 2002 was justified, too. I also think that they have been taken way too seriously in some respects, while not seriously enough in others.

Since I know that those people are probably reading and will probably continue reading, I want to say this:

I have specifically asked, many times, that you not read this site if you don’t like what I say. I have also asked that you not take it off the computer or try to use it against me with other family. Apparently, this isn’t possible.

I am sorry that you were offended by what I said, but I’m not sorry that I said it. That may sound childish or rude, but let’s face it, I’m not exactly thought of as the most mature member of the family.

I do think that it was unfair in 2002 to shut me out of your life for 9 months until you suddenly decided that something might happen and that you couldn’t live with yourself if it did. I think it was even more unfair that for the next 9 years, even when I tried to make up for the 2002 post, I was basically ostracized within my own family. I think it was unfair that I spent two Thanksgivings when I was severely depressed wondering what I would have to do to make you spend time with me on a holiday that we used to enjoy together.

I think it is unfair that I am the bad one about the January thing in general. I find out something that was apparently so private that people who share DNA couldn’t know, but that was okay for hundreds of thousands of strangers to find out at the same time as those strangers. I get pissed about it. I make one tiny little comment, then become public enemy number one. Meanwhile, it is okay that that post that got her so upset was found only 6 or 7 hours after it was made meaning: she was checking up on me. Yeah, you can say that I apparently needed to be constantly monitored, but the thing is that I didn’t.

I also think that it was unfair that in January, when you talked to her after the post, you didn’t somehow emphasize that making a phone call to me would only further agitate me. You have known me since I was a little kid. Have I ever really been comfortable on the phone? No. Have I ever really been able to vocally defend myself? No. Didn’t it occur to you or to her husband or to anyone who may have thought that call was a good idea that it was, in fact, a bad one?

I shouldn’t be forced to feel guilty because I said things you didn’t like. I shouldn’t have to be told not to write about things that you don’t like. If I cater to you or to anyone else, then I won’t be writing about what is upsetting me anymore. I won’t be doing what the blog was basically set up for. Writing about my issues is how I deal with them. If I don’t write about them, I go more crazy than I already am. If that happens, then I go to the hospital. If that happens, then what? Are you going to move my mom and dad down to your house to make sure that they’re taken care of? Are you going to try to keep up with their health problems? Are you going to give my mom shots (insulin or otherwise) when she’s so out of it that she can’t give them to herself? If I don’t write about these things, these are questions that you will have to have answers for.

What I say doesn’t actually hurt this family in anyway. How have you been harmed by my words? Offended? Maybe, but not hurt. Whereas, I’ve dealt with having my education called into question multiple times, been treated like a dangerous fiend since my time IP, and hearing speculation that my grandmother (and then my mother) have drug problems because of their use of pain medicine. I’ve seen our family get torn apart because suddenly there is only room in the family for you and my uncle plus your son, his wife, and their son, and maybe your mom’s “adoptive” sister that you apparently communicate with more than you do with your own biological sister.

I will not quit writing about things. I will not apologize about your getting upset by them. I will not pretend that I’m okay that this family has been so dysfunctional for years now. I will remind you that you are an adult, you have a choice about what you do when you’re on the internet, and you make the choice to read these things. You know what you will find and you do it anyway because that justifies the anger that you have toward me. The subsequent acting-like-Janet-is-a-subhuman attitude is then okay because I brought it on myself. If you don’t want to be angry with me, then don’t read things I say. If you don’t want to know that I’m frustrated about you, then don’t read it. Or learn to skip posts that are categorized as “family” because they “might” be about you and they might be negative.

So, I shall say this now: back off and try to get over it. Oh, and stop opening that entry over-and-over. It will not be going away. It will not be edited. You need to move on.

I’m guessing this feud will probably hamper any Thanksgiving plans, but…it might be worth it. Sure, Thanksgiving is one of those rare days where I actually do eat a significant amount of food, and it is one of the few days that I get to see people I’m related to that aren’t my mother or father, but if I’m going to have to put up with this crap then I don’t want to spend the holiday with them. I want to spend it with Nana. At least she’s loved me and actually tried to be there for me through all of this.

I shouldn’t spend a family holiday with people who clearly don’t want me to be a part of their family.  I want to be where I’m wanted, and that probably won’t ever be in a room where she is.

Mirrored from fuzzypinkslippers.com.

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